I remember most of my nightmares, rarely do i remember my good dreams. i had a sweet dream of love and now it’s going, going, gone, and because it was sweet i woke up and now it’s losing its power, the memory of it is fading away. i have a glimpse now of true love, love that lets love go, love that does not attach, love that is aware of true beingness. thank you, sweet love.
As I am walking home today I have the thought to stand on the bridge for a while and look at the river. It’s brown from the rain and not very appealing to the eye. As I look though I hear this mantra running through my head “leave everything you know behind” ( a line from David Whyte’s TILICHO LAKE). So I look again at the water, and this time leaving everything I know behind, i see the patterns in the water. They remind me of my skin and then i leave that behind. I bend my head so now it sees everything at an angle, it all looks like a painting, a live painting. I see the bank of the river, a patch of blue sky, beautiful white clouds, beautiful grey clouds, i see the trees on the river bank, i notice the little green spots on the branches. Then, behind the trees, the brown buildings, and then the hills behind them. and they’re all equal for a moment, frozen like a still picture. Of course, then another thought appears and it says “i never liked those brown buildings”. and i ask myself why. Why do I like the brown river more, or the blue sky more, or the cloudy sky more? And I see it’s because they are always changing. How beautiful change is. And then I realize that buildings change, just at a slower rate. And I think at how hard I have tried to stop change in my life. Why do i want to be more like the brown buildings than like the sky? I start walking again towards my home, and as life would have it, when I am about 5 minutes from home, it starts raining. And now I remember. It is this unpredictability that I don’t like. I am not dressed up for rain. What does change mean? I will get wet, I will have to change my clothes when I get home. For real? I start running and laughing at the same time. I am home in no time. It was not torrential rain. It was warm rain. It felt good to have it touch my cheeks and my hair. Change is not so bad after all. I love my changing mind. Until tomorrow.
The photo was taken from my husband’s blog